Saturday, September 25, 2010


I can't take it. No, I CAN. For you I can. It's hard to feel the pain of missing you.

I feel like there are thousand needles in my chest, making it hard for me to breath, thinking that you'll be away. We should be going to mass tomorrow, then we'll have our dinner together, then go anywhere, or just stay home. It doesn't matter as long as we are together. I can't bear the fact that I won't see you for 6 days, it's almost a week. Some may think I'm exaggerating but it's hard for me to survive the day without you - holding my hand, brushing my hair with your fingers, staring at me, teasing me to get me mad and making it up to me after. Almost a week, that thought freaks me out. I am strong, I know I can make it.. crawling, whining or whatever, I can make it. But I am not that strong without you. I never felt so weak, thinking that I can't be with you especially when I know that your 6-day leave can stir up something painful in my life. I can't help but cry. I cry because this is the only thing that I can do for now. I can't stop you, or even if I can, I won't do that. Your touch gives me strength but I think I have to deal  with this life, for a week, without it .Damn these tears won't stop from falling. I am still hopeful. God will never fail us. I prayed everyday to help us to be together forever, now He's giving us the opportunity to. Let's just trust in Him.

We've got plans, we know what to do. Let's just do it for the taking. I'll always be right here waiting for you to come back. I'm serious with our other plan, you know that. At first, I am not really sure, thinking that I'm just 21 years old and you are 24. We've got long years ahead, it's so doubtful that there are people who can make it. But this feeling is so strong, not even time could fade it. I was just thinking about my mother and father, they made it. So why can't we?

I love you so much. Whatever it takes, let's just hold on to each other. You'll always carry my heart with you.

*typing while sobbing, cant see the words, cant move a finger...


Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Just like my interpretation of a dream, something in me has to die. I was not really sure what exactly it is so I thought that 'something' is my bad attitude. I think everyone should do that. My procrastination, unable to forgive easily, pride and vanity should diminish as soon as possible. But this morning, I added one thing on my list - my 'being too close'. I think it's a part of me, I'm being too close to some people, well, perhaps my friends, guy and girl friends, well.... But I'm just like that. I can be too close without really feeling anything. I know I have to cut it out. I'm no eligible college easy going floozy gurl anymore. Something has to die, something.. something.. And this is what you call beautiful death. :D


---- This song is awesome :P ----


Monday, September 20, 2010


It's late at night and I know I should get some sleep right now. I don't know why but I don't want to sleep because, trite as it sounds, reality is finally better than my dreams. I'm so happy with you and these five words aren't enough to prove how I really am. I am amazed by you, in everything that you do, in everything that you are. It's true that I tremble when I start to reach out for your hand. My body's shaking, it always feels like the world's in slow motion. And when I finally get to hold your hand (or your arm), I get the relief that, yes, you are, in fact, MINE. I cannot contain it, this is too much to be kept. Even my eyes can't hide it, I'm so inlove with you. And this, this love is all I've got. I've trusted you my heart. My plans are all about US. Please, don't tear me apart. Let's keep everything in God's speed to be assured that everything will turn out right for us. I don't really care if it'll turn out right or left as long as in this journey, I'm with you. It may get rocky sometime soon but everything is going to be alright as long as we have each other. We can always do it together. You, me, US.

Thank you for always making me feel special. Thank you for proving to me and to the world that you love me. Thank you for making me feel beautiful all the time. Thank you for not wanting to hurt me. Thank you for making me feel good about myself. I hope I do the same (and more) to you. I love you.

Yours and only yours, 

Friday, September 17, 2010


Monday, September 13, 2010




Happy 1st month my love.

I hope you realize how much I love you. This love means many things to me but at the same time it means one thing - You. I cannot elaborate more so that I could explain more that you have to believe that I'll be always yours until you want me to.You know I waited for you and you proved that good things come to those who wait. I didn't fall on disappointment, I was just so overjoyed. I've been waiting for someone like you, doing the things that you do, saying the things that you say and every little thing that you do, you do it best. For the past days, you did your best to show me that I could trust in your love. I hope you'll always feel that I'm doing my best with you, that I'm trying in every way to show you every day that I really love you, so much. I hope this love is more than enough for you to stay with me. We are young, our story is young too. I know it is so early to talk about forever but we both have long term plans for us. I am so hopeful, we always have God by our side so we are assured that everything's gonna be alright. I still have many more to say but not more than enough things to do to prove my love for you.

At this moment it feels like undying, unending, forever. Forever is a dangerous word so I think let's use the term 'a lifetime'. Let's make this last for the rest of our lives.

Seryosong post to.. haha... Char char naman! wushu... XD